Hi All,
1st of all i would like to mention i won't disclose my real name, but the story i am going to write is 100% based on my personal life,
and the purpose of this writing is to let the other parents know, how their behavior can bring up a mentally sick person , who will suffer all his life in frustration.
Not: Purpose of this story is not to blame or insult my parents, its just a lesson for others who doing the same with their kids :( i still care for my parents, after all they brought me up. but couldn't love them all my life, sadly .
everything went fine until i started my social life.
school was a totally different place for me, i was grown up under lots of care & love, teachers in school were not that soft hearten, i have seen them beating the children like animal, and i lost all my confidence , the fear started grown inside me, instead of concentrating on my lessons, i was always afraid of the stick in teachers hand,
and finally the day came when teacher beaten me, and i refused to go to school, told my parents and they promised they will visit school and tell the teachers not to beat me again, but that was fake assurance,
after some time i understood that its my fate that i should be beaten by teachers and stopped my self from informing my parents, as they were supporting my teachers as they thought its good to beat me if i can't answer the question in school,
as i reached the age 6 i was also beaten in mosque by the Imam sahab ( religious teacher) and the reason told that i couldn't read properly or can't remember things in given time, and the response from my father was same, that its OK to beat for study , it was heard by myself , father was telling the teacher beat him more, if he is not doing good in studies (both religious / school).
i would like to mention, that there was nothing to entertain myself, nothing to play , even if i was beaten by my father if go out with my fellows to play, and the reason was these children don't have manners, they talk in a rude way etc etc. but at the same time i was not provided any source to spend my free time in healthy activities, instead my father pushed me to study even more in my free time, so that when i grow up i could be a rich man.
i continued to excell in studies both in religious & school, but the kid inside me was scared of every one, i couldn't enjoy my success in studies, for me real joy was to play outside and make noise all around , which was not allowed at my home,
when i was 10, our family grown to 7 people , 4 more children were born, and the behavior of my father became more violent with the time, beating all of us was a regular thing used to happen at our home, my mother was soft heart lady, she always loved & took care .
because i was forced to stay at home all the time, i was grown more likely a girl, all my hobbies & acts were girlish as girls from neighbors often used to come at our home. on the other side i was doing good in religious studies and i was enjoying it,
then the worst moment came in my life, when my tuition teacher started to molest me, i was threatened by him, and i already lost my trust on my father , and the fear stooped me telling anything to my father about this molestation. and that teacher continue to do it on daily basis. it effected my studies badly and downfall started. i was being beaten 3 times a day , 1st at school , 2nd at tuition, 3rd at home by my father.
sometimes father looked in good mood and he often tell us jokes , but all in all we were afraid, who knows he becomes angry and start to beat . for reasons like, we are playing at home and making noise, we woke up late in morning, or missed any prayer , went out with friends etc etc.
insulting in front of his friends was common thing, comparison with other kids was confidence killer for me, i started to accept that i am foolish person on earth with no purpose in life.
i grown up as poor decision maker, i always got confused when taking decisions in my life, as i was told since childhood there are much more better kids are out in the world.
i must mention it here, my father always provided me best food, best cloths and affordable pocket money.
then the time came to change the school a better and bigger school ,
To Read Next Part Click Here
1st of all i would like to mention i won't disclose my real name, but the story i am going to write is 100% based on my personal life,
and the purpose of this writing is to let the other parents know, how their behavior can bring up a mentally sick person , who will suffer all his life in frustration.
Not: Purpose of this story is not to blame or insult my parents, its just a lesson for others who doing the same with their kids :( i still care for my parents, after all they brought me up. but couldn't love them all my life, sadly .
Birth
i was born in a village of PAKISTAN, i was 1st child in my family, and every one took a lot care of me, everyone loved me, they bought me expensive cloths, toys and most of all gave me very unique name, it was an age between 1-4, i don't remember all the things, but as i heard from others, every one was so happy as i was 1st child and a boy.everything went fine until i started my social life.
School Life & Adolescence
At the age of 4 , i was admitted in govt school , i was considered intelligent as my mothers taught me all basic books at home, before i joined the school, in the meanwhile i was also admitted in Mosque to learn basics of our Islam, as i was born Muslim. so all started fine.school was a totally different place for me, i was grown up under lots of care & love, teachers in school were not that soft hearten, i have seen them beating the children like animal, and i lost all my confidence , the fear started grown inside me, instead of concentrating on my lessons, i was always afraid of the stick in teachers hand,
and finally the day came when teacher beaten me, and i refused to go to school, told my parents and they promised they will visit school and tell the teachers not to beat me again, but that was fake assurance,
after some time i understood that its my fate that i should be beaten by teachers and stopped my self from informing my parents, as they were supporting my teachers as they thought its good to beat me if i can't answer the question in school,
as i reached the age 6 i was also beaten in mosque by the Imam sahab ( religious teacher) and the reason told that i couldn't read properly or can't remember things in given time, and the response from my father was same, that its OK to beat for study , it was heard by myself , father was telling the teacher beat him more, if he is not doing good in studies (both religious / school).
i would like to mention, that there was nothing to entertain myself, nothing to play , even if i was beaten by my father if go out with my fellows to play, and the reason was these children don't have manners, they talk in a rude way etc etc. but at the same time i was not provided any source to spend my free time in healthy activities, instead my father pushed me to study even more in my free time, so that when i grow up i could be a rich man.
i continued to excell in studies both in religious & school, but the kid inside me was scared of every one, i couldn't enjoy my success in studies, for me real joy was to play outside and make noise all around , which was not allowed at my home,
when i was 10, our family grown to 7 people , 4 more children were born, and the behavior of my father became more violent with the time, beating all of us was a regular thing used to happen at our home, my mother was soft heart lady, she always loved & took care .
because i was forced to stay at home all the time, i was grown more likely a girl, all my hobbies & acts were girlish as girls from neighbors often used to come at our home. on the other side i was doing good in religious studies and i was enjoying it,
then the worst moment came in my life, when my tuition teacher started to molest me, i was threatened by him, and i already lost my trust on my father , and the fear stooped me telling anything to my father about this molestation. and that teacher continue to do it on daily basis. it effected my studies badly and downfall started. i was being beaten 3 times a day , 1st at school , 2nd at tuition, 3rd at home by my father.
sometimes father looked in good mood and he often tell us jokes , but all in all we were afraid, who knows he becomes angry and start to beat . for reasons like, we are playing at home and making noise, we woke up late in morning, or missed any prayer , went out with friends etc etc.
insulting in front of his friends was common thing, comparison with other kids was confidence killer for me, i started to accept that i am foolish person on earth with no purpose in life.
i grown up as poor decision maker, i always got confused when taking decisions in my life, as i was told since childhood there are much more better kids are out in the world.
i must mention it here, my father always provided me best food, best cloths and affordable pocket money.
then the time came to change the school a better and bigger school ,
To Read Next Part Click Here
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